Goodbye, Hello

I’ve written about this before; about how I tend to have to say goodbye to a lot of people. I am a wanderer, and I believe that because of my wanderlust I tend to attract other people who love to travel and explore too. I love that, but the downside to it is that my life as a mom makes me a bit more stuck in one place than most wanderers. 

So this often results in me making new relationships with people who at some point or other moves on to their next destination. And no matter how much I would’ve loved to maybe join, I can’t. 

So that’s how I’ve ended growing very accustomed to saying goodbye and watch people leave. 

But sometimes, those goodbyes are not forever. Sometimes I get to say hello to them once again, and it’s a bittersweet thing.

To see them, to hug them, to actually be able to have them next to me again, it is the most wonderful thing. 

Knowing that it often comes with a Deja Vu like feeling of having to say goodbye once more, it can be so sad and painful. 

But I am grateful for the time that I get with the person, no matter how short, and I know that every encounter shapes me and the life that I lead. Sometimes it even ends up pushing me in a direction that I never saw coming. 

Some days though, I can’t stand the goodbyes, the waves and the backs of the people walking out of my life. 

One day, it would be nice to have someone coming into my life with the intention of staying. Someone to go on adventures with, instead of watching them going off on their own. 

Here’s hoping! 

2 thoughts on “Goodbye, Hello

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  1. This was definitely a bittersweet post. Saying goodbye is never fun, especially if you have even a glimmer of desire to be more of a wanderer like those who travel on for whatever reason, mainly because they perhaps aren’t tied to anything or anyone in particular. Maybe because I’m a teeny bit older than you, I must say, and please don’t take this the wrong way, I actually see you as the lucky one because you are a mom and you have roots.

    So many people are wandering around the planet looking for themselves, or something, or someone, perhaps a sense of home? I don’t know. I mean, of course, not everyone. But I feel like a lot of people in our generation are wandering around like…’ummm I am really looking for some happiness and I just don’t know where in the world to find it.’ In one sense, I feel (and this is just my personal opinion), that you’re a bit ahead of the game. Jus trying to look at the bright side:)

    My cousin once shared something with me that at the time I totally blew off like what does she know, but she said, ‘sometimes people (friends, lovers, even family) come into our lives for a season, and that is OK.’ Sounds kind of simple and dumb (and I swear my cousin is super smart), but until I looked at my ‘goodbyes’ in that way, it didn’t resonate. I am a super sensitive person. Because I’m pretty strong-minded and outgoing, etc, a lot of people don’t get that about me, and I am totally okay with that. I never want anyone know my weak spots. Anyway, goodbyes are really hard for me, especially when it’s not like a goodbye see you soon, but more of a ‘bye, good luck with your life’ sort of thing. I used to really take those unspoken, and some spoken, goodbyes SO hard. Seriously, so hard. I remembered those words about seasons and started to tell myself those words. When a person moved away, or moved on, or for whatever reason we just never saw one another as often; rather than take it super hard like ‘WTF did I possibly do this time, they hate me, everyone is better than me’, to ‘ok…this sucks, but, everyone has their path/journey/their own shit they are working out…and people come and go, sometimes they stick around and sometimes it just doesn’t work out.’ It helped thinking of things that way. I think that’s sort of where protecting hearts comes into play. And now I’m simply much more protective with my heart and emotions.

    Is this too much? lol. I am positive I took this way overboard. I’m into tirades and side stories though. Sort of like the B-side. Anyway, thinking of you Christina. And wishing for you someone special who will appreciate your roots, who sticks around, and has no desire to stray anywhere in the world without you. Talk soon:)

    1. Awww! Stephanie ❤️I loved this! Read the comment at 5.30 in the morning and it made me smile all day whenever I thought of it.

      I definitely feel lucky and grateful for what I do have in my life already 😊And it’s not that I would like to throw that aside for the possibility to wander. It’s more the wish of meeting someone who would like to wander together with me when that is an option. Single life is something that I’ve come to really enjoy, and I love spending quality time with myself, but it’s always scary whenever you meet someone who you picture yourself sharing future adventures with, and then finding out that they don’t have the same vision.

      But someday I hope to meet someone who is on board with my boat of wandering ideas 😊And I’m positive that you will too ❤️

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