Throughout life I’ve been through several different stages with my personality. For some time as a very young girl I could run up to strangers and talk and talk and talk. I even fell asleep in the laps of an old couple I met on the train once. I only remember bits and pieces of this and can’t say for sure how long it lasted or what it was that happened for it to change. Because it did change. I can remember starting in first grade, all excited and willing to learn anything and everything they threw at me, but this is when my thoughts started to wander. I would find myself staring out of the window. Looking at the wind dancing with the trees, the clouds making faces and the weather changing from sun to rain to snow and back to sun again. I was the the princess of daydreaming, and every student-teacher-parent meeting we went to they always said the same thing:
‘Christina is very smart. She does what she is told and usually gets it right most of the times. She is a very good student, although she should try to raise her hand and give answers out loud more often. Oh, and she has a habit of staring out of the window, daydreaming.’
I guess some things never change. I don’t think I could stop it even if my life depended on it.
I had friends in school, not many but the ones I had were amazing. My dear friend Kirsti has been my best friend from way back then, into the now and I’m guessing to infinity and beyond. But when it was time to switch to high school, my best friend moved and started at another school than mine.
I found a few really good friends at my new school, but those three years are the years where I got pretty shy in many ways. Bullying does that to a person. I wasn’t the worst case, but none the less there were more nights crying in my bed room than it should have been. Good friendships, family and the pen and paper got me through it. A while back I took the time to flip through the notebooks I had back then and it was covered with stories and poems where there should have been math and French. My grades were good and I still liked the learning process, I just wished that I could experience it in an environment where being shy and hold back felt like the best option.
Something changed AGAIN when I got to be about sixteen. The bullying had scarred me but it also built character that I am grateful for today. I started my adventure into adulthood and as for most of us it had its bumps and cracks. Little by little I got to know who I am and who I want to be. I learned how to be comfortable in my own skin and wanting to help others feel the same about them. I found a positive person inside of me that had been hiding in a corner for too long and I nourished her and we grew as one and we are still do! I found the writer in me again and again, but it wasn’t until very recent years that I had the guts to pursue it. I’ve said that I’m going to be a writer since I was around five years old, but this time right here is the time that I finally dare to say;
I’M A WRITER!
Even though my novel isn’t done yet, writing isn’t something that I choose to do anymore. It is something that I have to do!
Going on that journey from sixteen till now there has been a lot of changes, and I’ve met some truly amazing people along the way. I’ve broken out of my shell and I’ve found the pleasure and excitement of challenging myself and all that I know. To go out on adventures and find those tiny or grand things that makes our lives, our short time on this earth so incredibly amazing. I started to label myself as an extrovert.
A while back I read a book called “Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop talking” by Susan Cain and how I saw myself changed after this.
Society has taught us that we have to be outgoing extroverts if we want to become anything in life and we take their word for it. We write exactly that about ourselves on our resumes, our dating profile and we tell it to ourselves. But what I discovered reading this book was something completely different.
As I read more in depth about what being an introvert really means I found that I was a perfect fit for a confident introvert. I’m not afraid of talking to strangers, but I always carefully weigh the words that I’m going to say. I like being out and around people at the same time as I love the moments that I have to myself. These are just a couple of many things I recognized in myself while reading this book, and even though I was a little shocked at first I’m very happy about it now.
Did you know that introverts usually are the best leaders? Something to think about, right?
I’m not going to sit here and say that being this or that is better than the other. I know a lot of very extroverted people that I find truly fascinating and amazing, and the same goes for those who are shy introverts as well. It’s not really about labels, it’s about being comfortable in your skin. To know who you are and to love yourself for it!
Hi! My Name is Christina and I am a Confident Introvert!
Now, tell me about YOU!