One of my very best friends has been going through a rough time lately, and the last time we had an hour long heart to heart over the phone she asked me a question I couldn’t answer.
What is love to you?
I’ve thought about that a million times over the years and I think the answer sort of changes as I change. As I grow and I learn, my definition of love changes.
When I was little I thought it would be like in all of the fairytales we were told. Swept of my feet by mister charming and live happily ever after.
Then when I became a teenager I discovered that love was difficult to understand. I was just about to start to learn to know who I was and to learn what love was turned out to be a bumpy ride.
At seventeen I learned that love was really hard. That when you love someone they won’t always love you back, but that doesn’t mean that you stop trying to get them to even though you really know that you should. I got myself hurt over and over by not being able to let go. That love was so overpowering. It consumed me and clouded my judgment. In one way it is the most intense “in love” I’ve been, but it is also the one that scarred me the most. But that’s okay because it has shaped me into the person I am today.
A month before I turned twenty I gave birth to my beautiful son and love was in the picture. To look into the eyes of that little boy taught me a different kind of love. A kind of love that never leaves that never really change but nevertheless it always grows!
A hoped that I had my happily ever after back then but I got to learn how much it could hurt to fall out of love.
One failed relationship after that I started a new life in Oslo. I wasn’t looking for love but somehow love found me.
So what is love to me now?
Love is having that person in my life that makes me smile. That guy that loves all parts of me. The guy that makes me sit up at 4.30 am like I’m doing now just because it’s so darn hard to fall asleep without him by my side.
Love is being with that someone that makes you excited about what’s to come in the future. To not fear it because you know that you’re going to face it together.
Love is to know when to give each other some space to breathe without being afraid of losing one another. It’s being able to sit together in silence as well as having conversations that might last all night.
Love is to not always agree, but being able to listen ans discuss.
Love to me is so many things and sometimes everything just feels right. That feeling that tells you that this is where you were ment to be.
I think love is different for us all, but somehow when we really have it we know. That doesn’t mean that every time we know it’s true love that it will last forever because forever is a promise that’s hard to keep. But as long as you give it your all. Put your heart and soul into it then it will be pure and it will be real. And whatever happens it will define you.
Love is the thing that shapes us and at the same time we shape our perception of love.
All we can do is leap into it when it feels right. Love each other like there was no tomorrow and hope that it will be your happily ever after.